From my first childhood memory to some of the best events in my life, food was one of the centre parts of that memory. Everyday, a good meal, snack or treat can make or break your day. Food plays such a big role in your life, I would dare to say that without it, you will be as good as dead so you can just as well make it exciting.
The problem nowadays is that you will find that one person in the room that classify themselves as a foodie and you feel totally out of your comfort zone. What if your hotdog doesn’t have a great fancy name, like rosemary infused sausage on a roll drizzled with balsamic infused tomato puree, or what if you want to eat with a spoon but little miss foodie next to you say that you should be eating with chopsticks.
I found this great website that will help you to be a foodie and have everyone around you wondering when you have become such an expert on food.
Step 1: Start with Semantics
Make all of your favourite snacks sound totally incredible by just jazzing up their names. Do not say that you’re having just regular cold meat on a croissant, but rather call it a deconstructive Beef Wellington. Why just say carrot sticks when you can call them crudité.
Step 2: Bring on the Buzzwords
The best way to describe your boring lunch to a foodie is to add an overplayed adjective. Any combination of the following will work just fine: artisanal: free-range, locally-sourced, vegan, vegan, paleo and so the list can go on – I think you get the idea!
Step 3: Slap on a Suffix
You can’t just like a certain type of food, you must truly love it with a passion. For instant, you don’t like sushi, you are a sushi-phile. You can add this onto type of food like a tomato-phile, cheese-phile, meat-phile and so the list can go on!
Step 3: Avoid Anything Processed, Unless…
You can’t eat processed food unless you are doing so ironically. Cheese toasties are a big no no, but if you order one from a smug hipster in a questionable food truck? Game on.
Step 4: Presentation is Key
When it comes to presentation, the smaller the better. If you’re having comfort food, you’ll need to eat it in the least comfortable way possible: a ramekin of macaroni cheese, a shooter of stew, a single lump of bread pudding on a tiny skewer. Perhaps you’d like to eat more than seven calories at a time? Then think outside the fork.
So go ahead, take some chopsticks to an ironic, rosemary-infused, deconstructed bacon roll you got from a converted ice cream van next to a port-a-loo, you pork-o-phile…and enjoy! (Or rather, “Bon Appetite!”)